Sunday, January 6, 2008

The Enchanted Tiki Room - Under New Management

April 5, 1998 - present

THE TIKI, TIKI, TIKI ROOM
Lyrics and music by Richard M. Sherman and Robert B. Sherman

[Jose]
(yawning) My siestas are getting shorter and shorter. Hey, Michael, mi amigo! Pay attention, it's showtime.

[Michael]
So it is. Pierre, you rascal, you! Let's put on the show!

[Pierre]
Mon ami! I am always ready to put on the show. As is my good friend, Fritz!

[Fritz]
My goodness, you're all staring at us! We'd better start the show rolling!

[Michael]
Wait! Wait! We forgot to wake up the glee club.

(whistling)


[Jose]
Ole, ole! It's showtime!

In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room,
In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room,
All the birds sing words and the flowers croon,
In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room.

Welcome to our tropical hideaway,
You lucky people, you.
If we weren't in the show starting right away,
We'd be in the audience...

[Iago]
Hey! Hey! Stop the music!

In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room.

Are you listening to me?

In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room.

I said, stop the music!

FRIEND LIKE ME

[Iago]
Obviously, you birds don't know who we are. Don't you guys ever fly to the movies?

[Jose]
We don't get out much.

[Pierre]
We mean, uh, we are like, how do you say, "attached" to the place.

[Iago]
Well, don't get too attached, chumps, 'cause we're the new owners!

[Jose, Michael, Pierre, Fritz]
New owners?!

[Iago]
That's right. Now, listen, you birdbrains! If you're gonna keep your jobs, you've gotta get hip! I know all about it, see...

'Cause I'm a very famous movie star.
Oh, Hollywood's just my name.
Who cares about Aladdin or Jafar?
I'm the one with all the looks and fame.

I've got a million crackers in the bag.
And I plan to get a zillion more.
And you guys will all have me to thank when they're linin' up at the door.

You are borin' tiki birds.
I'm a big celebrity!
That's why I'm gonna go
And change your show.
Ain't it great to have a friend like me?

[Jose]
But, seƱor, we've done the same show...

[Fritz]
...yah, since 1963.

[Iago]
My, how time flies.
Get a life, you guys.
You're ancient history.

Can your hands do this?
Can your wings do that?
Can you [?] birds sing...
...in punk or rap?

Can you rock and roll?
Well, listen here.
It's a whole new world.
So, you'd better get hip
Or your audience will disappear.

I'm your show biz magic lamp,
Rub me right, I'll set you free.
You've paid your dues
Now, you birds can't lose.

Ain't it great to have a friend?
Great to have a friend?
Ain't it great to have a friend?
Great to have a friend?

You ain't never had a friend like me.
And you've never had a friend like me.

GODDESS OF DISTASTE

[Zazu]
Iago, please. The Tiki gods can hear you.

[Iago]
If I hear one more word about those Tiki-tackey, polynesian, pineapple-pickin', wood-for-brains, moron Tiki gods,...

[Jose, Michael, Pierre, Fritz]
(gasp)

[Iago]
Hey. Who turned out the lights?

[Zazu]
That would be the "moron" Tiki gods.

[Pierre]
Oui! Oui! We are doomed!

Doom is in the air.


[Fritz]
You're sure right, my friend Pierre.

[Jose, Michael, Pierre, Fritz]
It's so hot, hot, hot.

[Pierre]
(?), mon a me.
For the end is plain to see.

[Jose, Michael, Pierre, Fritz]
'Cause it's hot, hot, hot.

[Zazu]
Wha...wha...wha...what was that?

[Tiki Gods]
Uhoa.
Uhoa.
Uhoa, Oa, Oa.
Uhoa.
Uhoa.
Uhoa, Oa, Oa.
Uhoa.

[Jose, Michael, Pierre, Fritz]
Uhoa, the Tiki goddess of disaster!

[Uhoa]
Who dares defy the Tiki gods?

[Zazu]
Um, he did.

[Iago]
Oh, thank you very much, Zazu!

[Uhoa]
Be careful, my fine-feathered little friend! When you mess with polynesia, the Tiki gods will squeeze ya'!

You're messin' with me, baby.

[Chorus]
Should've paid your dues.

[Iago]
Wait! Someone else defied the Tiki gods!

[Uhoa]
You're stressin' me, baby.

[Chorus]
Should've listened to Zazu.

[Iago]
Hey, look at the time! Gotta fly!

[Uhoa]
You can't fly away .
Now you're stuck.

[Iago]
I'm stuck!

[Uhoa]
I have cursed you.
For pushin' your luck.

[Chorus]
Bye, bye.

[Uhoa]
It won't help to yell.
You are under my spell.
Look out, parrot.
You're a dead duck.

[Iago]
(screams)

[Uhoa]
Aloha! (laughs wickedly)

IN THE STILL OF THE NIGHT

TIKI RAP

The birds in the trees
Sing pretty harmonies
We tiki gods like to rock
So let's all sing like the birdies sing

(Tweet, tweet)

[?] so hot
(Uh huh)
The boys in the back are kamikaze
And that's because they are macaws
Most little birdies will fly away
But us tiki room birds are here every day

TIKI ROOM CONGA

[Iago]
And now that we've got a smash show on our wings...let's party!

[Michael]
Look! Here come the girls!

[Girl Parrots]
Come on and see and let us do the conga.
No, we can't control ourselves any longer.
Get into the Tiki rhythm of the samba.
This is where the Tiki birds [?].

[Iago]
Whoa, yeah! Sing it, girls!

[Jose]
I wonder what happened to Rosita.

[Zazu]
Oh, dear. I'm afraid I'm not familiar enough with this type of music to...get down and get funky.

[Iago]
Just wing it, Zazy-boy!

[Zazu]
(clears his throat)
Come on and see and let us do the conga.
No, I can't control myself any longer.
Get into the Tiki rhythm of the samba.
Don't defy until you try to mambo.

Tweet, tweet, tweet.

[Jose]
Everybody.
Let's fiesta.

[All]
To the rhythm of the beat.

[Iago]
Take it, Pierre, baby!

[Pierre]
Miss Uh-oa
Saved our show-a
When she turned up the heat.

[Girls]
She turned up the heat.

[Zazu]
My friend Iago
Learned his lesson.
And now
He will be discreet.

[Iago]
Oh, yeah? That's what you think! Time is money!

GET ON YOUR FEET

[Tiki Gods]
Get on your feet!

[Iago]
You've heard 'em! Stand up, everybody! Up! Up! Up!

[Michael]
And now, as long as you're all standin'...

[Jose]
...we have a wonderful magic trick for you.

[Iago]
A magic trick?!

[Fritz]
Yah. Everybody face the door. And the trick is...we're gonna make you all...disappear!

[Iago]
Ha! Ha! Now you birds are gettin' the idea.

[All]
Goodbye.
Farewell.
Aloha.

Get on your feet.
It's out the door
You go-ha.

On your feet.
On your feet.
Out the door.

HEIGH HO

[Iago]
Come on, everybody out! Migrate, people! Migrate!

[All]
Heigh ho
Heigh ho.
It's out the door you go.
We hope you've all enjoyed the show,
Heigh ho, heigh ho.

[Zazu]
Bye, bye, no. Cheerio. You've been an impeccable audience.

[Iago]
Hey, kid, that's a real smart idea. Walkin' directly under a bird. Good thing you're wearin' a hat!

[All]
Heigh ho
Heigh ho.
Just lift your feet and go.
We'll sing the song,
You'll march along.
Heigh ho, heigh ho.

[Iago]
Come on! Keep movin'! You've had enough enchantment for one day!

[Zazu]
Bye, bye, now.

[Iago]
Hey, lady! It wouldn't hurt you to walk a little faster!
Boy, I'm tired. I think I'll head over to the Hall of Presidents and take a nap.

[Zazu]
Right! Off you go!

[Fritz]
Wonderful! Wonderful!

[Jose]
No one laid an egg but me.

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